Dearest Darling Friends,
These two words, ‘stress’ and ‘pressure’ mean two different things to me.
Stress denotes negative emotions, loss of control…ready to escape.
Pressure denotes composure, positivity, in control, situation that has grabbed total attention seeking action and solutions…ready to face it all!
While stress is bad, pressure can be really good as it leads to ‘focus’, leading to fantastic results. While stress reduces my performances and joy; pressure handled properly enhances my performance experiencing joy throughout the journey. There is a sense of loss when under stress. There is a sense of adventure when under pressure.
When things do not go our way, we have a tendency to become stressed. There is a surge of negativity in thoughts and feelings.
‘Things are going very wrong’, ”No one understands my needs’, ‘I am always misunderstood’, ‘Why do I have to suffer always?’, ‘The worst is surely going to happen’…are a few thinking patterns of the mind and heart under stress. Fear, hurt, jealously, frustrations, anger, helplessness are the feelings associated to stress.
Lack of control dominates our being in moments of stress. There is a sinking feeling in the pit of our stomach. All these are gravely harmful to us, this all of us know.
If all this is already known to us then you must be thinking, Why this ‘Life School Message’? Where is this LSM leading us to?
The objective of this article is two fold. Primarily it is to make all of us realise the difference between stress and pressure. Situations that we handle with stress NEED NOT MAKE US STRESSED at all. They MUST be handled as a pressure situation bringing the best out of us. Continuously remind yourself, this situation will bring the best out of me. I am bigger than the situation!
Secondly I want all of us to contemplate on some questions, “Do you realise, in the future, what will create stress in you? How have you planned to handle it?”
I observed my behavior and asked a few friends what do they do when face stress.
Very interesting range of answers emerged. One of my friend Dr Ashish plays the Keyboard as his STRESS BUSTER. Another friend Sonika dances for STRESS BUSTING. While another friend Rupesh eats for STRESS BUSTING. One friend eats ice cream while someone I know goes for shopping. (Thank you my good lord, my lovely lovable wife NEVER does this.)
One honestly admitted to having slashed their ankles, while one physically weak looking lady proudly said she breaks the crockery and throws utensils around at her home. Some others bang doors, while some scream it out. Some cry silently while some shout at helpless people. Some fight needlessly, while some beat their own loved ones. There are also some who resort to destructive habits like smoking or drinking liquor leading to life long misery. One friend shared he just goes off to sleep.
It is common to find parents beating/screaming at their child when under stress. The stress got busted, then they hug the child, say ‘sorry’ leaving the child either perplexed or guilty or vengeful but never ever normal.
It will be interesting discovery for you to know what do YOU do when stressed? Do you have a harmless stress buster or a harmful stress buster? More importantly what will you now do about it?
In case you have a harmless stress buster, Congrats! But, one question for you! Can you still find a way to channelize your stress to more rewarding activities?
If I ever feel stress, I am either be going for a walk (reward will be health) or read a good book ( reward will be a smile, a laughter, a new idea, getting inspired etc). At the end of it all, I will be more DETERMINED than ever before, never to get stressed for the same reason ever again. Eventually any stress I have must serve as a ‘Motivation Machine’ for me.
Whatever happens I will ensure stress does not hurt me or others or my resources.
This is a promise!
On the other hand in case you have a harmful stress buster, please do take care of yourself. It will be awesome to develop your own creative way of handling your stress, harmlessly. it will be even better when you too can channelize the stress to rewarding activities. Please promise to yourself never to harm yourself or your loved ones because of stress. Lets make Stress and Pressure as our ‘Motivation Machine’.